Match Made In Prison
by queenofallmedia
Summary: Boo and Pennsatucky find other ways to celebrate Valentine's Day while stuck in prison. [AU fic. set in season 1. involves: john/daya , vauseman , tricia/mercy , flaritza, and nichorello]


_A/N: just to clarify , this is set in season 1 , when Tricia was still alive. also some things I wrote in here are just headcanons I have and not actually real and I know it's not even close to Valentine's Day but it is always the time for platonic boosatucky , y'know ? happy reading ! xx_

* * *

 **February 13**

"You know what I fucking hate? Valentine's Day." Carrie Black, or better known as Big Boo, announced, while munching on a candy bar. She was a short, black-haired butch woman with a bulky frame, blue eyes, and tattoos decorating the length of her forearms.

"Why?" Her companion, Tiffany Doggett, or Pennsatucky to those who knew her well, asked. Where Boo was large, Pennsatucky was small and wiry, with long, wavy dark brown hair spilling down her shoulders. She also had hazel eyes, and horrid, rotting teeth, no doubt from her days as a meth-head. Other than the teeth, she was actually quite pretty.

A small mountain of candy lay between the two inmates, who were sitting cross legged opposite each other, slowly devouring their way through the pile of sweets. "It's just a day where people decide they love each other more. Shouldn't people treat every day like Valentine's Day? Chocolate and roses are just extra fucking pricey on fucking Valentine's Day. It's a fucking gimmick to make more money." Boo stated, tossing aside her candy wrapper.

Pennsatucky shrugged. "I like it. I ain't never celebrated it before, though." She said softly, biting into a chocolate wafer. " _Never_?" Boo asked, raising an eyebrow in surprise. The Christian girl shook her head. "Nah." She replied. Pennsatucky never really had anyone to celebrate an occasion like Valentine's Day with. All her experiences with boys before she went to prison still scarred her mind to this day. There was only one exception to that, and he'd left her, a long time ago.

"I had a few. They were memorable. The sex was extra good on those days." Boo grinned fondly at the memories. Pennsatucky just shrugged again, her lips pressed together, the chocolate wafer on her lap.

"Want me to hook you up with someone in here, get a little insider's view on what it's like as a dyke?" Boo grinned and shoved Pennsatucky's knee jokingly, trying to cheer her friend up. The wiry girl gave her a quick smile and shook her head.

"Nah." She replied, dully biting into her chocolate wafer again. Boo looked at her almost pitifully. Her friend looked so sad. Boo thought for a moment. "Hey, I have a great idea, for your first Valentine's Day celebration. It's not as good as the actual thing, but it's still a pretty good idea. I think you might like it." She said, a grin slowly spreading across her lips.

* * *

 **Fe** **bruary 14**

"Okay, so what's the plan?" Pennsatucky whispered, her tiny body pressed against Boo's large one. They hid behind a corner, spying on CO Bennett, who was hanging around in the hallway, pacing on the spot and looking awkward.

"Okay, I've been picking up on Diaz's schedule, because when she arrived I was hoping she was a lesbian, or at the very least, gay for the stay, so I could get to her and brag about it to Nichols, but since that clearly isn't happening, I gave up on that dream. What I _didn't_ give up on is Diaz's schedule, because I have nothing else better to do in this hellhole." Boo replied softly.

"Which Diaz?" Pennsatucky asked. Boo sighed. "An annoying, but somewhat understandable question. Dayanara." She responded. Pennsatucky nodded in understanding. "Here she comes now." Boo said, and ducked out of sight.

"Okay, so you will go up there and walk past her. I will walk up there, and trip _into_ her. You will push her into Bennett in the chaos. _Capisce_?" She whispered, and her friend nodded. She stretched her arms and rolled her neck.

"What happens if we fail?" Pennsatucky asked. Boo shrugged. "I don't know. You agreed to this." She replied. "That's cause I wanted to shut you up. I don't believe this is gonna work, 'cause it's fuckin' crazy." Pennsatucky hissed. Boo rolled her eyes. "You gonna chicken out on me or what?" She said.

Her companion exhaled slowly. "I'm ready." Pennsatucky said determinedly. She strolled down the hallway casually, her hands in her pockets, paying absolutely no attention to Bennett. She walked past Daya without acknowledging her existence at all. Bennett didn't notice the tiny girl, as he was too busy trying not to stare at the pretty Latina too obviously.

Boo walked down the hallway, and gave a yell as she tripped over her own foot, stumbling into Daya, who also gave a shout of surprise. Boo's acting was surprisingly believable, and Pennsatucky made a mental note to let her know later. Right now, she had other things to do.

Bennett, whose gaze was automatically drawn to the commotion, didn't notice as Pennsatucky crept up behind Daya and shoved her into Bennett. The tiny inmate ran away to hide behind another corner, while Boo apologised profusely, her hands raised in the air.

She snuck away while Bennett was busy asking Daya whether she was alright, dashing down the hallway to meet Pennsatucky. "This ain't gonna work." The wiry girl whispered. Boo shushed her.

"You sure you're okay?" Bennett asked, for the fifth time. "Yes I am, John, really." Daya smiled shyly up at him, tucking a lock of her brown hair behind her ear. Their voices were soft, and carried a hint of shyness. The two friends had to strain their ears to hear them. "So uh, it's Valentine's Day today." Bennett said. Daya nodded, waiting for him to continue.

"I've uh, been meaning to give you something, but I couldn't find the time." He pressed a small box into her hand. "And uh, meet me at our spot later, at 4. Is that okay?" Bennett asked hesitantly. "Yeah." Daya nodded, with a smile.

Pennsatucky turned to Boo, her eyes wide. "No fuckin' way." She breathed. "Told ya. The old trip-and-fall _always_ works." Boo chuckled. Pennsatucky laughed along and slapped her friend's back. "Convinced now?" Boo asked.

Pennsatucky nodded vigorously. "Who's next?" She asked, and a grin broke across Boo's face.

* * *

Boo and Pennsatucky strolled through the hallways, playing the perfect part of two innocent inmates. Well, not innocent. Prison-rule-abiding, at least. Their next targets were still undecided. Pennsatucky ran over a list of the couples in Litchfield, and was pondering the possibilities of making Leanne and Angie sleep together when Boo interrupted her inner babble.

"Okay, I have one. Chapman and Vause." Boo said. "No!" Pennsatucky exclaimed. "Piper Chapman is the fuckin' _devil_." She said, jabbing a finger into Boo's chest. "She fucking disrespected me!" She said.

"Only after you did it first." Boo pointed out wisely. "Yes, but-" Pennsatucky's sentence fizzled out, and she simply stood there and sputtered. "The point is, we got history, Chapman and I, and I ain't doin' her no favors. Plus, I ain't never liked Vause either." She stated, biting one side of her lip. "Think of it this way. Don't think of this as helping them be together. Think of it as us exploiting, or even _manipulating_ their relationship for our own entertainment. Hm?" Boo said, nudging Pennsatucky in the ribs.

The tiny girl mulled it over. "Well it does sound pretty good, when you say it like that." She grinned. Boo chuckled. "That's the spirit. Okay, I already know what we should do..."

* * *

"Hello, Chapman." Boo said innocently, walking into Piper Chapman's cube where she sat reading a book. "Hello, Boo." The blonde girl replied slowly, already sensing something as she put her book aside. "What can I do for you?" She asked, blinking her blue eyes slowly with mistrust.

"Oh, nothing. It's Valentine's Day today." Boo said, sitting beside Chapman. "Yeah. Larry and I usually celebrate it together, but now he and our friends are off at some fucking cruise thing, having lots of fun without me." Chapman rolled her eyes. "And you and Vause are off again?" Boo continued smoothly.

"Don't even fucking start." Chapman rolled her eyes. "How about me then? You ever been with the big ol' butch type before?" Boo grinned. "No!" A chuckle burst out of Chapman despite her negative response.

"You really need a V to spell Valentine, y'know." Boo pressed. Chapman narrowed her blue eyes. "A V. AV. Alex Vause." Boo added, and her companion recoiled. "Jesus, _no_!" Chapman exclaimed.

"Why not? It gives you a chance to have comfort for the one day, _and_ you get to lord it over Alex Vause." Boo said. "What do you mean?" Chapman replied. " _You_ go in. _You_ initiate it. _You're_ in control." Boo continued. "Why would I want to do that?" The blonde asked.

"Why not? V-day comfort, and..." Boo looked around quickly, as though she was telling a huge secret. "A little birdie told me that Doggett's gone dyke, and that she's after Vause." She whispered. Chapman recoiled in disgust.

" _What_?!" She exclaimed. "I don't know, you may 'hate' Alex Vause," Boo air quoted the word, "but surely you don't want _Doggett_ of all people to have her." She said.

"Alex wouldn't go for her." Chapman pointed out. Boo raised an eyebrow. "Well how do you know? Maybe she's gone from the blonde-haired, blue-eyed type, to the tiny little brown-haired type. Though she'd probably avoid the teeth." She chuckled to herself. "But anyway, I hear she'll be making her move down at those toilets near the cafeteria. Vause has agreed to meet her, from what I hear." She added.

When Chapman didn't answer, Boo pressed on. "She _has_ been pretty nice to you lately. What's the harm? It'll be just like a one night stand." She said. "A very hot one night stand who's tall and wears glasses, and that you hate, sure, but..."

"I really don't want to." Chapman muttered. "Yes, but think of it this way. Doggett is a little shit who's been nothing but rude to you. Don't let her win." Boo clapped her friend on the shoulder.

Chapman stood up. "I'm going to hate myself for this." She mumbled. Boo laughed. "That's right, go get 'em!" She cheered as Chapman walked out of her cube. Boo followed behind, walking to the telephones to rendezvous with Pennsatucky.

* * *

"Jesus, why the fuck are you fucking whistling? Have you finally gone full retard?" Leanne Taylor, a bad-tempered blonde with blotchy skin, snapped at Pennsatucky, who was grinning and whistling a tune as she folded grey jackets of all sorts of sizes.

"In a good mood, is all. Got a problem?" Pennsatucky asked lightly, her tone singsong, her voice raspy. "Heck yeah I got a problem. Shut the fuck up." Leanne muttered. Pennsatucky ignored her, and carried an armful of folded jackets to a different table, and purposefully crashed into Vause, making it seem like an accident. Alex Vause was a very tall inmate, with straight black hair, green eyes, glasses, and pale skin.

"Whoops. Sorry." She flashed a black-toothed grin at Vause, who raised her eyebrows. "What's gotten into you? Finally cleansed all your sins and got accepted into heaven?" She asked. "Hey fuck you, I ain't no sinner. I've already got a guaranteed spot up there unlike the rest of y'all." Pennsatucky snapped, momentarily allowing her anger to overwhelm her.

She took a deep breath, and exhaled slowly. Losing her temper was not part of the plan. "Sorry." She said. "Seriously, apologising to me twice in 5 minutes? What the fuck are you on?" Vause asked. Pennsatucky shrugged.

"Well, it's Valentine's Day, and I don't got no Valentine or no one to love, but I know someone who do got someone, and that someone ain't there for them, and that's better than me." She grinned again. "Jesus, you got some fucked up shit in that meth-addled brain of yours." Vause muttered.

"I'm only happy, cause it's a fuckin' sinner who's getting what she deserves." Pennsatucky continued happily. "Sinner? That's like, everyone but you around here." Vause chuckled, wondering why she was still even bothering to continue the conversation.

"Yeah, but this one deserves it, like real bad. With her fucking blue eyes and blonde hair and walking around like she better than us..." Pennsatucky allowed her sentence to trail off, walking to the dryer to pick up a fresh armful of clean clothes. By the way Vause paused in her actions, she knew she'd gotten the black-haired girl's attention.

"Piper?" She asked. Pennsatucky nodded vigorously. "Poor, poor thing. Saw 'er down in them bathrooms near the cafeteria, lookin' so sad and shit." She laughed, and Vause sighed. "Probably missin' her fancy fiancé or something, cause he ain't here, y'know." The Christian girl continued. "Of course I fucking know." Vause snapped.

She stood there for a moment in silence. "Boo told me that she seemed real desperate for a friend down there, so too bad there ain't no one there for her." Pennsatucky pressed, and the look in Vause's green eyes told her she'd won.

"Fuck it." Vause murmured. She slammed down her armful of laundry, pushed her glasses to the top of her head, and stormed out. "I'm going to hate myself for this." She mumbled as she left, completely missing the little triumphant grin playing on Pennsatucky's lips.

* * *

"How goes it?" Boo asked as she and Pennsatucky 'accidentally' ran into each other by the telephones. After Vause left, Pennsatucky had trailed her to make sure she made it to the toilets. And she did. The next things she heard were Chapman's and Vause's voices, and they were talking, not fighting.

"Success." The scrappy girl mock-saluted her companion with a grin on her lips. The bulkier woman whooped and high-fived her tiny friend. "Fuck _yes_! We're fucking _amazing_ at this." Boo laughed triumphantly. "So what's next?" Pennsatucky asked. Boo frowned. The smaller girl snapped her fingers. "Miller and Valduto." She said. Boo frowned.

"Tricia and Mercy?" She said skeptically. Pennsatucky nodded. "Are you out of your fucking mind?" Boo scoffed at her. The brown-haired girl shrugged. "Why not?" She asked. "You _are_ aware that Mercy left me for Cornhoes, right?" Boo asked.

"Yeah, but maybe it's time to let it go now." Pennsatucky said. " _You're_ the one still angry at Chapman for something that happened so long ago." Boo pointed out. "That ain't the point." Pennsatucky replied. "This is some real fun shit, you know? Exploitin' slash manipulatin' other people's relationships for our own fun?" She continued, grinning at her friend, her hazel eyes sparkling.

"Jesus, I fucking hate it when you use my words against me." Boo muttered. Pennsatucky laughed. "So you in?" She pressed. Boo sighed. "Fine. But only because I made a promise to myself to cheer you up today." She pushed Pennsatucky, who stumbled a little. Before Pennsatucky could choke out a small, surprised word of thanks, Boo had already started speaking.

"Alright, so, here's our plan..." She began laying out their latest manipulative scheme.

* * *

"Hello, Tricia." Boo said, walking into the common room where a pale, thin, pretty girl with a tattoo on her neck and long blonde hair styled into cornrows sat watching TV. "What the fuck do you want?" Tricia Miller asked warily.

"Now now, no need to be a bitch. I come in peace." Boo said, sliding into the empty seat next to the blonde girl. "Now, as you are probably aware, today is Valentine's Day. Any plans?" She asked.

"I ain't fuckin' telling you. You're just gonna ruin it." Tricia glared at Boo. "I come in peace, I swear. Here." Boo fished a packet of M&Ms out of her pocket. Tricia eyed the chocolate warily, but Boo could see the desire in her eyes.

"I'm serious. It's not expired, and completely sealed. I come in peace." She repeated, handing the packet to Tricia, who examined it and muttered a word of thanks before ripping it open. "So, any plans?" Boo repeated, as Tricia began chewing on an orange M&M with a dubious expression on her face. She relaxed after a while, and popped another one into her mouth.

"I was thinking of doing something for Mercy. But I don't know what to do." Tricia said softly. "You know what Mercy likes? Music." Boo said. "Yeah, I know that. She's real into those bands that play really loud music with the sad lyrics." The blonde girl said, offering Boo some M&Ms. The older woman grabbed a green M&M and tossed it into her mouth.

"Yeah, like My Chemical Romance or some shit. I don't know. Anyway, take her to your bunk later after dinner, and just lie down and listen to music together. Mercy likes sex, but she also likes to just hang around." Boo said, reaching for another M&M. "Really? She's into that?" Tricia said in surprise.

"I dated her for a long time." Boo shrugged, the unspoken "until you came along" hanging between them. "But I don't got any music like that on my radio, and Mercy's got broken a while ago." Tricia said. A grin broke across Boo's face. "Leave it to me." She said.

* * *

"Alright, I bear fantastic news." Boo announced, wandering into the laundromat, where Pennsatucky had returned for her work duty. Leanne and her friend Angie Rice, gave both of them the evil eye. Well, mostly Leanne. Angie didn't really care. "What is it?" Pennsatucky asked, folding white sweaters at top speed and stacking them untidily.

"I got Tricia to ask Mercy to hang with her later." Boo announced. "Great, but what's the plan?" Pennsatucky asked, tossing a folded white sweater onto a teetering pile of untidily folded sweaters. "Mercy likes all that emo band shit, like the Gonzales girl. Flaca. And I don't know where to find a radio with that kind of music on it." Boo said.

"So this is where I come in." Pennsatucky predicted. "Yes. You've gotten special shit since day one, with your priest lawyer crap and your thing with Healy. You'd be able to get a radio with emo music on it." Boo began. Pennsatucky just gave her a confused frown as she started tossing folded sweaters onto another pile.

"So, all you have to do is ask Healy for a CD player with emo music on it, and you have to do it, fast. Think you can manage that?" Boo said. "What am I gonna tell 'im?" Pennsatucky rasped. "You'll figure it out. Good luck." Boo clapped the thin girl on the back, and left.

* * *

"Hey, Mr Healy." Pennsatucky knocked on the door of her counselor's office. "Oh, hello Doggett." Sam Healy looked up from his mountain of paperwork, smiling at the inmate. "Got a minute?" She asked. He nodded, and she let herself in. Healy was a big-sized CO with grey hair, kind blue eyes, a thing against lesbians, and a soft spot for her.

Pennsatucky shut the door behind her, and sat down in front of Healy. "What can I do for you?" He asked. "Well uh, I'll be honest with you. I need a favor." Pennsatucky admitted, letting the right amount of shyness and vulnerability enter her voice, shifting in her seat. She was always rather fidgety.

"I uh, it's Valentine's Day today, and I ain't got no one to celebrate it with. So uh, I've been feelin' a little down all day." Pennsatucky admitted. "Doesn't Reznikov usually throw some sort of party?" Healy asked.

"Her parties are great and all, but I don't think they'd really welcome me there." Pennsatucky shrugged, rearranging her facial expression into one of despair. "And you want me to make them let you in?" Healy asked in his slow, gentle way. The thing about Sam Healy was that he was always trying his best, yet nine times out of ten he would misread the situation. Pennsatucky shook her head vigorously.

"No, no. I uh, I was wonderin' if you could get me a CD player, with a CD of one of them emo bands. Like uh, The Smiths or some shit." Pennsatucky said. "Why?" Healy questioned. "Because like, the lyrics will make me feel better, since like sad and sad together will make happy, y'know?" Pennsatucky said, looking Healy directly in the eye. She could practically hear him going _what?_ internally. Pennsatucky was, as Boo once told her, fluent in talking bullshit.

"It's against the rules." He said. "Yeah, but it ain't like I've been bad lately or anythin'. And I know you confiscated some CDs last year from Gonzales." She said.

Healy sighed, long and slow, and Pennsatucky knew she'd won. "Alright. Here." He reached underneath his desk and pulled an old-fashioned CD player out. "I got a few discs here. Take your pick." Healy tossed a few CDs onto the table and watched as Pennsatucky selected a few discs while she chewed her lip.

"Thanks, Mr Healy. I'll be sure to bring it back tomorrow." Pennsatucky gave him a black-toothed grin, and stood up, stuffing her things in her slightly oversized grey hoodie. She almost left without saying anything, but turned back on an afterthought.

"Happy Valentine's Day, Mr Healy." She smiled at him, a genuine one. Healy, the only person who had never been repulsed by her rotting teeth, smiled back without hesitation.

"Happy Valentine's Day, Doggett." He said.

* * *

"Aw, look at 'em. It's almost cute." Boo sighed as they spied on Tricia and Mercy listening to music while lying in each other's arms, sharing a pair of earphones. "It is. You just ain't admitting it." Pennsatucky pushed her gently, sucking on a lollipop.

"Fuck you." Boo replied promptly. "Oh, and uh, we got more time. And I got a plan." Pennsatucky said. Boo chuckled. "Again? Looks like I got you obsessed." She grinned, and turned to her friend. Pennsatucky shrugged.

"It's a great way to keep busy. You in?" She asked. Boo's grin widened. "Oh hell yes."

* * *

"I gotta say, I'm impressed, my small tiny friend. Simple, yet perfect." Boo commented, after Pennsatucky relayed her entire plan to her friend. The tiny Christian raised her palms in the air, her face turned downwards as she grinned.

"Thank you." She replied, trying and failing to be modest. Boo chuckled and shoved her companion jokingly. "This is gonna be _fun_." She said.

* * *

"Hello, Pennsatucky!" Boo exclaimed, walking into the library and giving a huge, fake start of surprise upon seeing her friend sitting there reading a book. "Hey, Boo!" Pennsatucky called, looking up from her book to greet her friend.

"Shut the fuck up!" Taystee reprimanded them. Pennsatucky flashed her a grin. "Sorry." She said. Poussey _tsk_ ed and shook her head. Boo slid into the seat next to Pennsatucky's.

"Well?" She asked in a low voice. The two inmates had been going around the entire camp pretending to run into each other, in search of their next targets. At some point, they'd split up for a while, and decided to meet up in the library later on.

"One's in here." Pennsatucky whispered, and Boo grinned widely. "I got Gonzales already. I'm guessing the one you have here is Ramos." Boo said. Pennsatucky nodded. "Yep." She said.

"You got the note ready?" Boo asked. "Yep." Pennsatucky repeated, fishing a note out of her jacket pocket. It was penned entirely in block letters so that it would be harder for their target to identify whoever wrote the note. Boo read it and sighed.

"Your spelling is complete fucking shit." She said, and pulled a fresh piece of paper out of her pocket and rewrote the note. Pennsatucky sighed. "Here." Boo handed her the new note, and Pennsatucky read it before she slipped it into her pocket. "I think 'chapel' is spelled with two Ps, y'know." She added, getting up. Boo just rolled her eyes.

Pennsatucky shuffled towards the romance section of the library, where Maritza Ramos, a pretty young Latina woman with light brown skin and black hair, was sitting and reading a novel. She seemed unusually forlorn, probably because her best friend Flaca wasn't there to keep her company. Vaguely, Pennsatucky wondered why the two of them were apart, but pushed the thought out of her head.

Pennsatucky wandered behind the bookshelf Maritza was leaning against, and carefully placed the note by her side. She took a deep breath, preparing herself to disappear. Pennsatucky flicked the little piece of paper, causing it to flutter down to Maritza's side. She dashed away immediately, but not before she caught sight of the Spanish girl noticing the note.

"Success." Pennsatucky reported to Boo. They high-fived, grinning at each other. "Wanna go spy on 'em?" Pennsatucky asked. "Fuck yeah I do." Boo said, getting up. "Oh, by the way, aren't the meth-heads pissed at you for leaving them down at Dirty Panties Inc.?" She asked. Pennsatucky shrugged. "They are, but fuck them." She said.

* * *

"Hey Flaca. What did you want to see me about?" Maritza asked, entering the chapel. Her friend was already there, looking confused. Pennsatucky and Boo were already hiding behind a seat the back of the chapel, listening intently. "What do you mean? I got this note from you, saying _you_ wanted to see _me_." Flaca said, absently running her fingers through her abnormally straight black hair.

"What? No, I got one right here." Maritza pulled the note from the breast pocket of her beige scrubs. "Me too." Flaca replied, showing Maritza her own note. The two of them compared the handwriting on the messages. "I can't actually believe this is working." Boo mumbled. "You said it was perfect just now!" Pennsatucky protested softly. "I lied. This will not end well." Boo whispered. Pennsatucky resisted the urge to smack her friend.

"Oh my God, that is _so_ not my writing." Flaca said. "And that is totally not mine either." Maritza added. "So like, someone brought us here for a reason." She continued. Flaca shrugged. The two of them sat around for a while, waiting to see if the person who had called them there was actually going to show up.

"This is a terrible idea." Boo whispered. "We should get out of here." Pennsatucky agreed. The two of them prepared to go, until they heard Maritza speak up.

"Oh hey, has Ian written to you yet?" Maritza asked all of a sudden. Flaca sighed. "No." The taller Latina said bitterly. The sad expression she wore, plus the teardrop tattoo on her face made it look like she was crying. "Has he picked up your calls?" Maritza asked. Flaca shook her head. The smaller girl's mouth twisted into a sympathetic frown.

"Come here." She said, holding Flaca close. "Thanks." Flaca answered softly, wrapping her arms around Maritza. "Hey, this is a crazy idea, but do you want to just, like, make out a little? Not like in a lesbian way, but like in a comfort way, you know?" Maritza asked. Flaca thought it over for a moment.

"Sure." She smiled at her friend, and pressed her lips against the other Spanish girl's. Maritza leaned in, her hands going from Flaca's body to her shoulders. The taller girl's fingers entwined themselves in her friend's glossy black hair, closing her eyes. "That was nice." Maritza grinned. Flaca grinned back with a nod. She leaned in again.

At their hiding spot in the chapel, Pennsatucky shoved Boo, with an in-your-face look smugly twisting her features.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. It worked." She grudgingly admitted, with a smile she couldn't hide.

* * *

"I think that's enough for one day." Pennsatucky announced. "Yeah." Boo agreed. "We were productive as fuck, though." She stated, and Pennsatucky nodded her agreement happily. The older woman swiped a fruit from the Christian girl's fruit cup, and for once Pennsatucky didn't complain.

The two of them swept their gaze over the cafeteria, enjoying the fruits of their labor. Vause and Chapman were sitting together, not speaking, though Pennsatucky could swear they were holding hands under the table. Flaca and Maritza were nowhere in sight, presumably still in the chapel together. Tricia and Mercy were positively glowing, both of them unable to keep their eyes off one another. Bennett and Daya were determinedly ignoring each other, though Boo caught them making eye contact at some point, and Daya flashed him the sweetest smile.

"This is pretty fuckin' awesome." Pennsatucky murmured. "I know, right? I feel like a proud parent." Boo chuckled. "I never thought I'd ever be this happy on Valentine's Day, in prison, with no boyfriend, you know?" Pennsatucky continued.

"Mm-hm." Boo said absently, her attention elsewhere. Her friend picked up on her distraction immediately. "What?" She asked. She turned, and followed Boo's gaze.

The older woman's eye was on Nicky Nichols, an ex-junkie with extraordinarily messy brown curls, who was sitting by Vause's side. Opposite her was Lorna Morello, a tiny Italian-American girl with gentle, pretty features, dark hair, and flawlessly applied makeup.

Normally, Nicky and Morello would be talking almost nonstop, but for some reason the curly-haired girl was avoiding her friend, a sort of awkward tension separating them. "Nichols and Morello ain't talkin' again? I thought they broke up a long time ago." Pennsatucky asked, sipping her drink.

"They are, but still. This is weird. They're friends. Sort of." Boo said. She turned to Pennsatucky. "Got energy for one more?" She asked. Pennsatucky's face broke into a wide grin. "Fuck yeah." She answered.

* * *

"Hey there Nichols." Boo said cheerfully, sliding into her bunk. "Hey." Nicky replied absently, her radio in her hand, the soft sounds of rock music escaping from her earphones. She pulled the wires out of her ears. "What's up? Wanna tell me all about how you finally managed to fuck Pennsatucky, and what it's like being with a hetero chick?" She asked with a crooked grin.

Boo laughed. "It's a work in progress." She returned her friend's grin. "No, what I really wanted to ask you was what's going on with you and Morello? Seemed a little tense earlier." She asked. Nicky chuckled. "We're fine. I'm just so sick of hearing her cry about Christopher all day." She said honestly.

"Why don't you get her something? Like a small gift, to take her mind off that motherfucker." Boo suggested. Nicky hesitated. "What would I get her?" She asked, after a pause.

"I don't know. Jewelry?" Boo suggested.

"We're in fucking _prison_ , Boo." Nicky glared at her.

"Yeah well, you come up with something!" Boo retaliated, fuming. Nicky frowned. Boo softened.

"I have an idea." She said.

* * *

"Funny how this happened, huh Penn?" Nicky grinned. "So we're on a shortened nickname basis now?" Pennsatucky asked. Nicky blinked in confusion and didn't respond. "Nevermind." Pennsatucky shook her head and bit back the rude remark threatening to escape her lips. To her, 'Pennsatucky' was a nickname only her friends were allowed to use, and to the rest of the inmates she was just 'Doggett', so she was surprised that Nicky had used her nickname _and_ abbreviated it.

"Wait, her hair's a little darker. Use that one instead." Pennsatucky pointed to a different colour pencil imperiously. Nicky rolled her eyes and put aside the one she was using. Boo's idea was for Nicky to draw Morello a little self-portrait, to cheer her up. Nicky wanted it to be perfect, so while Boo kept watch, she put Pennsatucky on Morello-spying duty, correcting Nicky when she got any details wrong.

"You know, you ain't too bad as an artist. This is real cute." Pennsatucky smiled. When she smiled, she tried to make sure her mouth was closed, because she was a little self-conscious about her teeth. Of course, half the time she forgot, so her smiles were always met with poorly disguised disgust. She envied Nicky, whose teeth were perfectly white and straight.

"Thanks Penn." Nicky added a few finishing touches to her cartoonish sketch of her friend. "There. What do you think?" She asked. While she wasn't as skilled an artist as Dayanara, Nicky's style had its own childish charm to it. Pennsatucky nodded her approval. "Looks great. Go get your girl." She smiled encouragingly, momentarily forgetting to conceal her teeth.

Nicky didn't recoil, simply smiled back, folding the drawing and tucking it into her breast pocket. "She's not my girl. And thank you." She added.

Unbeknownst to Nicky, the tiny Christian girl sneakily trailed her, a grin on her face.

* * *

"Hey, kid." Nicky said, walking into Morello's cube. Her bunkie wasn't there, probably waiting in line to shower. "Oh hey, Nicky." Morello smiled warmly at her friend, putting her wedding magazine away and shifting aside to make room for Nicky. Pennsatucky and Boo were hiding behind the wall of Morello's cube, spying on them from behind.

"Happy Valentine's Day." She said. "Happy Valentine's Day to you too." Morello replied happily. "You've already said that to me this morning." She added, almost as an afterthought.

Boo rolled her eyes. "Jesus _Christ_." She muttered to herself.

Nicky pulled the drawing out of her pocket, and Morello's brown eyes widened. "What's that?" She asked. "I had a little time, so I made it. For you." Nicky shrugged faux nonchalantly. "This is real cute." Morello's cheeks were pink, and she smiled sweetly. "What's the occasion?" She asked.

"It's fucking Valentine's Day, Lorna." Nicky rolled her eyes, a small smile tugging at her lips. "Yes but, I didn't think you'd get me anything." Morello explained. "But I did." Nicky pointed out.

"Jesus _Christ_." Boo muttered again. Pennsatucky shushed her.

"Thank you, Nicky." The tiny Italian-American carefully kept the drawing in one of her books, and proceeded to wrap her arms around her companion. "No problem, kid. Y'know I just wish you'd forget about Christopher for a bit. Quit crying over him. It makes your face all blotchy, and you once said too much crying gave you wrinkles." Nicky added, trying to lighten the mood. There was a pause.

"I love him, Nicky. You know that." Morello said softly, and snuggled up against Nicky, wrapping her arms around her. They sat in silence for a while.

"Maybe he was busy or something today. I shouldn't blame him." Morello decided, tightening her grip on the ex-junkie.

"Jesus _Christ_." Boo repeated for the third time, shaking her head. Pennsatucky just sighed.

"Do you mind holding me for a little bit?" The little Italian-American murmured. Nicky smiled crookedly, and put her arms around Morello, pulling her closer. She pressed a kiss against the top of her head. Morello smiled and snuggled closer, and when Nicky leaned forward to kiss Morello's forehead again, she tilted her head upwards, and brushed her lips across Nicky's in a gentle, butterfly kiss.

"Thank you." Morello said softly. "No problem." The kiss might've been a friendly gesture, or just a way of expressing gratitude, but Nicky smiled anyway, and held her a little closer. Morello closed her eyes.

"Looks like we did it." Pennsatucky said, smiling almost affectionately at the two of them. Boo nodded her agreement, a smile on her own lips.

* * *

"Hey there Pennsafucky." Boo said cheerily, walking into her friend's cube half an hour later while clutching her stomach, which seemed to be bigger than usual, and bulged in odd places. "Oh hey." Pennsatucky replied, raking a brush through her damp dark brown hair. Her friend sat beside her, and slipped two cups and a bottle of Mountain Dew out from underneath her shirt.

"Got this specially for you. I know Mountain Dew's your favourite." Boo grinned and opened the bottle, the soda fizzling softly as the gas was released. "Thanks!" Pennsatucky said, surprised and happy. The older woman poured the drink into both cups.

"Oh, and you can't call me that." Pennsatucky continued. "Huh?" Boo asked, eyes widening in surprise. For a moment, she thought she had legitimately offended her friend. "Cause Pennsatucky's already a name that's not my name, and like shortenin' it to 'Penn' or 'Tucky' or some shit is okay, but ya can't change it." Pennsatucky stated, her hazel eyes meeting Boo's intently. Boo burst into laughter. "Whatever you say, my tiny little friend." She grinned and handed her one of the cups.

"Thank you, Big Boobs." Pennsatucky grinned impishly, and Boo laughed again. "Nice one. Here. Cheers." She said, clinking cups with her friend. They both took a sip of their drinks.

"I had fun today, even though I didn't have a Valentine. Thank you." Pennsatucky smiled, her voice soft and sincere. "No problem. Thank you for making this God-awful day bearable for me." Boo smiled back, leaving all her jokes aside for once.

Pennsatucky took a sip of her Mountain Dew. "Hey, Boo?" She said. "What?" Boo asked.

"Happy Valentine's Day."

"Happy Valentine's Day to you too."

They clinked cups.


End file.
